The Importance of Thank You Notes

Writing thank you notes are important for any situation when someone gives you a gift or does something nice for you with no expectation for something in return, but it is even more important for wedding and shower gifts.


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There was a time when it was accepted and even appropriate to say thanks in person only, and sending a thank you not was nice but not expected. Those days have passed us by. Now etiquette demands thank you notes to be sent whenever we receive a gift or gesture from someone, especially in connection to large events like weddings and showers.

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Thank You Notes should be handwritten by the bride, mention the bride and groom, and specifically mention the gift or it will help.

You should also send thank you notes in a timely fashion, this includes when people mail you gifts before the wedding. Do not wait to send cards all at once, address each gift as it is received.

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When you receive a gift from a small group each person needs to be addressed individually, however, when it is from a large group such as a club or association or people from your workplace you can either choose to address each person individually or you can post a thank you card for the group somewhere where they will all see it such as a bulletin board with announcements or in the common areas such as the kitchen area.

Here are some examples of appropriate thank you notes for different situations:

If you receive a monetary gift you still want to send a thank you card. You may want to include how you plan to spend the money:

Dear Uncle Henry,

Jeremy and I would like to thank you for the check you gave us at our reception. We are grateful to have the money to help remodel our home. The check will be deposited in a special account and saved until we can agree upon how to redo our family room. Thank you so much.


Amy Adams

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If you received a gift from a close family member or friend the card to reflect the relationship.

Dear Josh and Jenna,

Thank you for the new Wii. Even though it was not on our registry it was something we really wanted. Thank you for being so thoughtful in your gift, and showing how much you know the both of us! Now we will always be able to have fun together at home. We will invite you over soon to play with us.


Amy Adams

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If you do not know the person who gave you the gift, you can still express your thanks appropriately with a thank you card.

Dear Mr. Benjamin Thomas,

Thank you for the lovely gift. Jeremy’s mother gave us your gift of the Home Tool Set Supreme and we love it. We have been meaning to pick up more tools, as we know we will need them in our new home. Jeremy loves them as do I.

Thank you again.


Amy Adams

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